loud + meek

I am loud.

If anyone were to describe me, I don’t think the word “quiet” would ever cross their lips. Or reserved. Or soft-spoken. Or gentle. I am loud and proud and outspoken and I speak often. Probably too often. Okay definitely too often. But that’s just how I am. I LOVE to talk: I love communicating ideas with people, I love to argue and pick the brains of people around me, I just can’t help myself. I was a debater in high school; much of my identity was placed in my ability to talk to walls and argue both sides of literally anything. And I loved it! I am just a talker. Ask my mother, I have been for my entire life. And in some ways, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

But one of my many fatal flaws/sins in life is this: my ability to gossip. I am the QUEEN of gossip, and boy am I ashamed of it. Gossip is one of those sins that almost seems innocent. One minute, you’re having casual conversation with your girlfriends about school and your friends or people you know, and then suddenly, you are saying terrible things about people that you don’t even know. But gossip is lethal.

“A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends”

–     Proverbs 17:4

“As surely as a north wind brings rain, so a gossiping tongue causes anger!”

            Proverbs 25:23

Running my mouth is an element of my personality, certainly. I am never afraid to speak up in defense of something I believe. I am always first to raise my hand and answer questions in a class or bible study. I love talking, especially about the Word of God. But upon reading the Word, I realize that the Lord truly admires a trait that I do not often exhibit: meekness. Being quiet when words are not needed. Speaking only when you have something good to say. Taming your tongue.

This brings me to one of my favorite passages in the entire Bible: James 3. I swear, this passages was written specifically for McKenna Grace Smith. It speaks volumes about my life and is applicable to me every.single.day. I read it and re-read it on a weekly basis to continue reminding myself of its truth. James writes about the dangerous ways of the tongue. Our mouth is really the only part of our body that cannot be tamed.

“…But a tiny spark can set a grand forest on fire. And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body, It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself. People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fist, but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison.”

            -James 3:5-8

Now, I understand that passage can be a bit scary and intimidating! But its words ring true: our tongue is a dangerous weapon. It has the ability to tear down the people around us. It sets our reputation. The words we say are often the thing people remember most about us. And when words are said, they cannot be taken back. My pastor once said that God gave our tongues 2 gatekeepers: our teeth and our lips. As Christians, we know that we should only speak words of encouragement, that gossip is wrong, etc. But it is part of the human condition to misuse our tongues.

But there is hope and encouragement in the Word of God! It is possible (and of course favorable!) to use our tongues for good.  Lysa TerJeurst writes, “Refusing to gossip is a beautiful decision to make. It not only creates richer friendships but, more importantly, it makes our relationship with the Lord more authentic and believable. We honor God when we honor eachother.”  I love this quote, and my heart beats to live it out, as much of a struggle as it may be. Our words can be used to tell the story of Jesus, to give our testimonies, to compliment others, to sing sweet hymns to our Lord, to provide encouragement, to laugh and make others laugh, and do so many other wonderful things for the kingdom. Things that are much more worthwhile and beneficial than gossip.

“But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace-loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.”

            -James 3:17-18

Our mouths were not created for evil. We were not created for evil. We were created with purpose, and the Word is our greatest weapon to fulfill our purpose in the kingdom. However, our tongue is another great weapon for communicating the truth of the gospel. And God has trusted us with this double-edge sword to be used for good! It is our duty as his people to speak truth in love, to be kind with our words, to spread the truth that the Bible promises, and to practice meekness.

God, thank you so much for choosing to use me for your kingdom. Thank you for your Word, which is equipping me to spread the truth of your love. I pray that you will tame my tongue and give me the strength it takes to do the same. I pray that I will speak words that lift others up and draw closer to you. Lord, please let the words that I speak come from you and you alone, and let my mouth be shut before I say anything that does not further your kingdom. Let me be a transparent window, so that others will see you when they speak to me. I love you and I am so blessed to yours forever.